To share or not to share.

Have you ever wanted to share and just couldn’t find the words?  Well, can’t blame it on that one this time!  I just joined a writer’s group.  An inaugural meeting of eclectic people, all unified  in faith, which we will keep each other accountable to, and so what did we do after introductions?  We wrote!  A devotional was read, we were asked to write about how that inspired us, and I wrote!  It was short, sweet, and done.  Then we shared.  Just like our parents taught us, well, except for the one person in the room who said at the beginning of the evening, she joined to share this part of her life which until starting this blog, was “secret”. People knew she wrote, she never shared anything she wrote except for a poem in 8th grade.  Now she’s all grown up, joining a group for encouragement and she gave them nothing to encourage her on, whatsoever!  They gave her two chances, for crying out loud!  The words were right in front of her and she balked.  Sigh, yes, “she” is me.   What I wrote had a rhythm, it became a speaking song, think back to INXS, “Hallucinate, dessegregate, mediate, alleviate, try not to hate…”.  Remember that one?  Go ahead, youtube it, I’ll wait.

I can write what I wrote here, even knowing my fellow group members have asked where my blog is, and will be reading it because, I actually want them to read it, I just don’t feel comfortable saying it.  Sheeesh!  I’m bold in so many other areas but, when it comes to writing from the heart or my own ideas, that gets so intense!  So, the devotion was about Fear no evil…And right away, I hear in my head and write on my paper:

Words whisper across my heart,

Reassuring, affirming through the landscape of learning,

Hold tight, don’t let go.

Take time to listen to that still, small voice.

Lean into the wind of uncertainty, expect God to show up.

He’s already there, the next step is mine, mine alone.

(At this point, the song, chant if you will, took effect)

Chorus:

Near me, around me, I lost me, He found me, surrounds me, confounds me, with undying love.

Verse:

Turn around, and walk away.

End this day and start to pray.

Deepen faith already there,

Sow the seeds of love and prayer.

Chorus:

Near me, around me, I lost me.  He found me, surrounds me, confounds me with undying love.

Now that wasn’t hard to write here at all. And, in all truth, if someone had pointedly asked me to share, I would have felt compelled to, and now I have told our fearless leader how to draw me out. I can give a monologue on stage in front of a hundred people.  I can sing in a musical, not the solo, let’s not get crazy, and perform, minus the first 30 seconds of stage fright.  I can lead a night of ministry to youth!  And stay completely silent on sharing my writing.  Oh, the irony.  And now, I challenge myself, in front of whomever reads this, known and unknown, to share and squeeze every ounce of experience out of this group.

 What’s your challenge this week? What’s one area you are completely uncomfortable with but, want to improve on or think would impact others if you would just step out of your comfy little box and, reach out, sing out, type out, act out, play out? Insert your own adjective here!  And don’t just think about it, do it!  I’ll keep you posted on my stage fright.